Wednesday, February 8, 2012

I'll Never Be Hungry Again

What you are about to read is not for the squeamish! Here is the trembling TERRIFYING story, of what happened when I had cereal...but no milk:

So, when I arrived home today, before I sat down to write, I was ambushed by a startling noise: The growling of my stomach! After much deliberation and perusal through the cupboards, I decided on....CEREAL! Since I have none of my most favourite cereal (Count Chocula) in my loverly home, I settled for the box of no design, that contained the clustered grains my tummy so desired. I figured that in order to sweeten things up I'd put in a few...(or a lot) of chocolate chips.

I looked to the cupboard once more to find the yellow bag, but I couldn't see it. After running up and down the stairs a few times I was back at the cupboards, determined to find the chocolaty goodness!!! I moved the jumbo box of granola bars and there they were...mocking me. >:( (death stare of doom) Since I had run up and down 16 stairs, three times, I justified that I could put in a few more chocolate chips than normal.

Now that I had my wonderful bowl of cereal, decked with a multitude of chocolate chips, it was time for.........THE MILK! I love milk. Milk is a wonderful creation, and i truly feel sorry for those who are lactose intolerant. So you can imagine my excitement when I opened the shining stainless steal fridge, spotted the glowing orange milk carton and saw.......THAT IT WAS EMPTY!!!!!!

But, with another hungry growl, my tummy told me that it was cereal or nothing! So, I had to think of an alternative. I filled the bowl with tap water...I was too afraid to try it. I grabbed a packet of Nescafe instant cappuccino. I gulped before ripping the package and pouring the powder into the soupy cereal concoction. All the powder floated in large unappealing clumps at the top... Quickly I stirred it as best as I could, though within 20seconds it began to foam.

I took a sip...

Shiver!!! Quick! Splenda!!! In the fake sugar went... I took a bite. Swallowed. It tasted like good cereal with bad coffee or vice versa. After another bite, I felt sick, and down the toilet it went. My taste buds may never recover...and I doubt I will ever make the mistake of being hungry again!


 Hmm? What's that tummy? Nutella you say? Oh, very well... Now where's the bread gone??

My love of milk can be shared by Tokidoki through......

1 comment:

Susan said...

OK, so hopefully there is plenty of milk in the 'fridge now? Sorry you felt sick afterwards (!! were you surprised??!) and I am now mourning the lost chocolate chips... :( Yuck -- tap water? What were you thinking? Well, I guess desperate situations call for desperate measures! :)